Day 7; Old Habits Die Hard

I have those moments. I’m one of those people who just have bursts of creativity and in a split second, it’s gone. I know exactly what I want to do, and then I blink and it’s gone. I over think, I doubt, I run out of words, and sometimes I just try too hard. Life isn’t always about planning and organization. Take time for yourself, time to read, think, listen and explore. Try new things before new things try you and take calculated risks when necessary. I don’t proof read because I know I’ll find something wrong and end up cutting, editing and losing something that might have actually been really good. I know I haven’t updated in a really long time, which I’m really upset with myself about, because I said I wouldn’t neglect the blog, but I’ll just let the universe take its course (if that’s the phrase) and accept that this is how it’s meant to be.
I’ve been writing draft upon draft about finding your feet which is something I really wanted to share because so many of us just don’t know where to start when it comes to finding our feet, let alone finding ourselves or our purpose. I kept trying and trying and then at some point I realized it just wasn’t meant to be. As you know by now, I often can’t find the words to explain how I’m feeling or what I’m thinking. I have a general picture, but it’s jumbled into experiences and thoughts only my brain would understand. This happens more often than I realize, and as I develop and organize more things, I realize I have a clear understanding of what I want to do, but there’s so many ideas that I can’t even roll them into one. When your thoughts are just bursting at the seams, how do you group and distinguish what’s worth trying, what should be shared with others and what I should just forget about?
I also have a very very bad habit of not being able to finish or continue doing things I should, which goes right back to self discipline (which I actually elaborated on in one of my “Finding Your Feet” drafts). It has a lot to do with things always changing in my life, and the fact that I give everything I take on 100%, but I can’t give 100 to everything at the same time…I have to remind myself that I’m only one person, while feeling guilty that I haven’t gotten through with what needs to be done. I’m also really bad at managing my time…more things to work on! Lol…but I do promise to try and be more frequent with my posts. I wanted to try to have a creative day at least once a week, so here I go! Let’s see if we can kill those bad habits.


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